Its time to cover a topic that I do not like to bring up in normal conversation. My mistake tattoo. See, I’ve made plenty of mistakes in the 21 years that I have been on this Earth, but this one is the most visible. This tattoo is something that I haven’t been able to hide without explanation to anyone and everyone who is unfortunate enough to catch a glimpse of it. Here is a picture.
Why would I get this thing tattooed on my body, you ask? Well, I was a 13 year old girl with the option to get a tattoo, so you can figure it out. Yes, I was 13. What makes it worse is that my stepfather was the one who tattooed it. If you know me or have read my other posts, you have learned that my stepfather is someone who has held me back my entire life and I have only been able to gain freedom by not looking back. This hideous attribute has forced me to remember the pain that he has caused me and I am sick of explaining myself every time someone sees it.
Today, I received two beautiful flowers that wrap around the outside of my right ankle (ignore the red, that is blood).
I have always had a love for flowers for a few reasons. Their beauty is an obvious feature, but the multitude of appearances that flowers take is another. Also, flowers are placed in dirt that helps them grow into the beautiful entities that they eventually become. I see myself in the same light, because even though I was given so much dirt to grow in during my teens, I chose to grow into a beautiful woman who belongs deeply to herself.
Yes, I’m deep.
I no longer have to look down in embarrassment. I don’t have to tug my pants down to cover it. I don’t have to remember the boy I liked in 8th grade and all of his friends relentlessly making fun of me for years. I am now proud of what I have displayed on my body. So before you ask me why I chose to get that ridiculous heart in the first place, please read this post and give me a hug or something.
I don’t care how many years it takes you to realize that you are in control of your own body, life, and happiness… But you will know your worth someday. I promise.